I just about finished reading “The Persian Pickle Club” – Sandra Dallas. Quilting is the central theme and so this book sheds light on how women gather around a quilt and share and care as they work on it together.
It is not always fine and dandy, they share their ups and downs, sorrows and betrayals, but the quilt does keep them together through good and bad times. At the end of the day, they stand together as one final product bound by the thread work.
Women folk in the book do not purchase fabric for their quilts. They trade squares, so that every quilt is interwoven with each others’ fabric. The symbolism being, that their lives though separate are intertwined and bound by threads of love and commitment.
My first thought was how this concept can be applied to matrimony. I always talk to people who have been married a long long time and ask them for their secret sauce. I have come to the conclusion that the longest lasting marriages are ones where the partners are as different as day and night, yet have a common interest that binds them.
Let me explain. A can be an introvert, B can be an extrovert. A loves dining in, B loves dining out. A likes watching TV, B loves hiking. So, if A and B were married would they not be headed for splitsville? Yes, under normal conditions, because they are two separate patches on the quilt bound together by nothing. If they had a common interest like say gardening or traveling or diving that could be the thread binding them together (bringing the fabric squares together). If A and B only focused on each other all the time that would be exhausting. Instead it is healthy for each to have their own separate identities and for them to come together for a common cause from time to time. My 2 cents as always 🙂
Let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.Khalil Gibran